I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
the condom got lost in my hair
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
