That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
