A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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