her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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