you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Randomize
