wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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