I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I just had sex on a roof
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
