haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
