Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
