We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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