i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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