Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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