We won't sleep together?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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