I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
