Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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