p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
