I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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