You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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