hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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