Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
