did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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