Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
