is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
