So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
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