I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
