just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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