Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
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