so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
