Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
