Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
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