Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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