I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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