The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
