goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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