wat bout pragnant strippers??
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Randomize