Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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