I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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