I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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