people are starting to question the shark bite story
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
