I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
