garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
