i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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