Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
