420 ftw
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
