the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
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