his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
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