two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
