At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
