he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I think your dad took our porno
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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