I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
