I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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